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07 September 2012

Silence says it all.



Today's writing piece comes from a writing prompt at Write on Edge about utilizing local nostalgia to create a short story.  As I just finished pasting this onto my blog, I realized I didn't utilize any particular "named" local things, but utilized a place and activities to tell my fiction tale.        

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     Lily sat on the stool facing the window, so she could get a good look at the bay.    Her coffee steam fogged her glasses, reacting to how cool it had been outside.  Fall in Seattle was her favorite season, but as she thought of a warmer place, a warmer time in her life, the orange leaves rippled into rolling waves.  Sand crept up between her toes; it was abrasive, yet comforting.  A set of wings flapped past her head, and Lily realized it was an old, hungry friend.  Lily made many friends at the ocean.  One in particular flooded her with nostalgia.
            It had been so many years since Drew, so many lost nights in the sand and surf.  His warm tan skin and his confident golden eyes enveloped Lilys memories in a passionate, yet fleeting embrace.  She couldnt recall how many times she questioned his intentions.  She was only visiting family for the summer, after all.  Nevertheless, Drew would smile and Lily would lose it all over again, swimming in his endless passionate kisses.
            Lily focused on one particular kiss, one that came after a very important question from Drew.  He had asked her for vow of marriage a commitment a 17 year old could hardly make.  Lilys heart had stopped in her chest, as her eyes welled with tears.  She knew she could not stay with this man at the oceans edge.  She might as well jump in the Atlantic herself and save him the misery of her answer.  Lily dropped Drews gentle hands and stared towards the waves.  Drew sighed, and Lily knew it was done.  He carefully moved a strand of hair from Lilys face, leaned towards her and pressed his lips softly to hers.  Ill think of you always, my little sunshine.  He whispered close in her ear and walked away.
            Maam?  Excuse me, maam?  I think your phone is ringing again.  Its been going off for ten minutes.  The store managers voice boomed through Lilys ears, while Drews words echoed into oblivion.  Lilys reality flooded in, taking all of her sand and sorrow with it.  


----Charlie----

6 comments:

  1. That was so sweet. Captured a young love lost very well.
    http://bit.ly/NYFUhc

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  2. Aww, so sad. Especially this line: "He whispered close in her ear and walked away." Vivid writing.

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  3. Wow, I felt myself there, with them. Very sweet story!

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  4. Thank you all! This is my first "romantic" story, as most of my stories are crime-ey related. Glad you enjoyed it! :)

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  5. Very tender. Being in a particularly melancholy mood myself, I really got into this short story. Thanks for sharing.

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  6. Very sweet, and certainly a beachy flair. Would love to get some specific sense of place or time to really anchor her in the memory!

    Thanks for linking up with us!

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