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24 February 2010

The wheels on my bus have fallen off.

It is as the subject says, "The wheels on my bus have fallen off."  My motivation bus has lost its wheels, ran out of gas, and started rusting on the side of the creativity highway.  Yeah, a bit exaggerated, but it's not untrue.  I haven't written in two months, much to my disappointment, and to those around me as well.  I'm not quite sure what derailed everything, but I guess life just happens sometimes.  I know it takes an extensive amount of time and effort to finish a book, and I know I have it in me to finish.  I am just having trouble finding the motivation I need to get moving again.  How do you all find the motivation when you run out?


20 February 2010

Strong like the Tree

Today I face one of my biggest fears: putting myself out there to be judged by my peers.  It sounds trivial to some, and all my friends say I have nothing to be afraid of, but it's hard to explain social anxiety to one who is not anxious or fearful about being around people.  My therapist told me a great story about the room of 10,000 fears, and how once you enter you can't get out.  If you walk through you will eventually come to the way out, but you have to face your fears to do so.  Most never make it out and are stuck in a perpetual state of fear, but a few face their fears and come out for the better on the other side.  I won't lie, I am still a bit nervous, but feel I have the courage to make it through my room of fears.  I rationalize by asking what the worst scenario could be, and it's never as bad as I think it is.  I'm very good at exaggerating my fears.  But part of my resolution (to just be me) involves being myself and not caring if someone judges me.  They don't have the power to affect me unless I allow them to.  So here's to keeping my head up, not freaking out, and having lots of fun today.  Wish me luck!  :)

--Courageous Charlie

14 February 2010

The Day of Birth

It's my birthday! I'm 25 now.  Happy birthday to me!!  Oh, and Happy Valentine's day to everyone else!!

--Happy Charlie!

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